Kill! Kill! Kill!: What My Dad Taught Me About Competition, Excellence, and Success

Kill! Kill! Kill!

Those are words my dad, Big Jim Frisella, taught me when my brother and I were little. They pretty much sum up his approach to parenting. And life. One of my earliest memories is of my dad giving Sal and me each a pair of boxing gloves and making us box. We were three and four years old!

As we got older, we played all sorts of sports. Football, baseball, wrestling, Lacrosse, hockey—you name it. And my dad didn’t want us to participate in sporting events. He wanted us to dominate them.

As we were driving to a football game or wrestling match or whatever, my dad would say, “Now, boys, listen up! When you get in there you’ve got to be aggressive. You’ve got to go in the corner and you’ve got to get that fucking puck out!” He’d always say “puck.” Even if we weren’t playing hockey. “Dad,” we’d say. “This is soccer.” “I don’t care what it is!” he’d say. “You just go in there and get it!” “What are you going to do today?” he’d ask, as serious as if he was commanding troops in battle. “Kill!” we’d yell in our squeaky, pre-pubescent voices, sounding like a couple of murderous thugs from a boy choir.

It was also understood that if, during a game, we ran over another kid or we scored a goal, we got a toy. We’d get to go to K-Mart or Wal-Mart afterward and pick out a good one. Not some Cracker Jack prize or trinket from a bubble gum machine. A legit toy—like a G.I. Joe action figure or a Transformer or something like that.

“What are you going to do?” my dad would ask a second time. “Kill! Kill! Kill!”

Some people get all offended by that story because they don’t understand the point my dad was trying to make.

  • It was never about hurting people
  • It was never about getting toys
  • It wasn’t even about sports

My dad wanted to teach us to be aggressive.  He wanted us to be competitive, because he knew that what Rocky Balboa said was true:

The world ain’t all sunshine and rainbows. It’s a very mean and nasty place, and I don´t care how tough you are, it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently, if you let it. You, me or nobody, is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain’t about how hard you hit. It’s about how hard you can get hit, and keep moving forward, how much you can take, and keep moving forward. That´s how winning is done.

My dad knew that life is hard, and that in order to succeed in anything, you have to develop a mindset and personal conduct that is serious as blood and tough as mother fucking nails.  He knew that success requires a killer competitive attitude and an unparalleled will to win.

Developing a competitive mindset and character is a necessity of being successful.  It doesn’t mean you focus on other people’s losses.  It means you have the will to be the best no matter what you’re doing in life, whether you work on the Stock Market trading floor—or you’re just sweeping it.

Because here’s the reality (and I will repeat this so many times because it is the mother fucking truth):

Our whole human existence and experience is set up for competition.

You look at a fucking video game made for a two-year-old:  It keeps score. Life on planet Earth is not kindergarten. It’s kill or be killed.  The world is not a playground. It’s a battleground.  It’s not syrup and sweetness. It’s survival of the fittest.  In the real world, nobody gives a shit about your feelings, your self-esteem, or your need for significance.  The real world deals in facts, not feelings, and what matters is action, execution, and results.  The reality is, history forgets whiners, but remembers winners.  Bottom line: The nature of real life demands that we see the pursuit of greatness and success as a competition—and only tough minded, hard-working, straight-shooting people win that competition.

That’s what my dad was trying to teach me.  That’s the message he was trying to drive into my head every single time we shouted out the Frisella family battle cry:

Kill!  Kill!  Kill!

Have you check out The MFCEO Project episode Competition Drives Excellence?

Inc. Magazine Features Andy Frisella As An Example of the Power of Personal Branding

Inc. Magazine featured Andy Frisella in a recent article about the importance of personal branding and how it relates to the success of a business. In an interview with Inc.’s Nicolas Cole, Andy shared how he first discovered the power of branding for personal and professional success:

“The quick backstory is that when I was first working on marketing 1st Phorm on Facebook, I didn’t know what to post. All the other companies just posted pictures of vitamins and protein powder. Not really the most exciting stuff. So I decided to do something different and shared motivational statuses on our company pages. Then when Facebook changed their algorithm to more of a pay-to-play model, I just started posting that same content on my personal Facebook page, and people really responded well to it. From there, media outlets started reaching out to me not just as an owner of a few companies, but as a motivator and entrepreneur–and that’s when I started to realize what I was on to,” said Frisella.

The article concludes with a statement by the author fully endorsed by The MFCEO:  “Having a personal brand is the single most valuable thing you could have in today’s economy. I highly suggest you start building yours now.”

Click here to read the full story.

Andy-Frisella-Featured-By-Inc-Magazine-A-Successful-Personal-Brand

There Is No Success Fairy (And Success Sure As Hell Isn’t Magic)

I used to think like most people.

I used to wonder if all this work would be worth it.
I used to wonder what would happen if I did all this work and still didn’t make it.

  • Was I wasting my time?
  • Was all the pain for nothing?
  • Was all the struggle for nothing?
  • Was all the anxiety for nothing?
  • Was all the fear for nothing?
  • Would it all pay off?
  • Would the “magical success fairy” and “the powers that be” grant me the life I desired?
  • Would I be one of the “lucky” ones?

Yes. I used to think like most people do when they think about doing “all this work” for a result that isn’t guaranteed. And then “it” happened….and it clicked for me a few years ago the day I bought my first Lamborghini. It’s not magical.

Success is not a “lottery” you win.

There is no “chance” and there sure as hell isn’t a “success fairy” or “powers that be” that grant you ANYTHING. I remember thinking:

“I did all this work…and now I’m here and this is MY car?” “WTF? That’s all it is?”

I was honestly kind of confused it was that simple…that’s when I realized…I AM IN CONTROL…my goals ARE GUARANTEED if I’m willing to pay the price. And here I stand on the other side of all the “what ifs” and I’m here to tell you…YOU ARE IN CONTROL TOO!

Most people let the this single thought stop them: “What if I do ALL this work and sacrifice all this time and it doesn’t work out?”…so they don’t do anything and accept society’s plan for them called AVERAGE…and justify their AVERAGE with comments like “it wasn’t meant to be” or “They got lucky” while they sit on a barstool on Tuesday afternoon with their “real” friends talking about how they got screwed.

Putting In the Work

What very few come to realize is putting in “all that work” and not reaching your goals IS IMPOSSIBLE.

  1. Form a solid plan.
  2. Execute that plan.
  3. Learn how to improve that plan every single day.
  4. Focus on your goals day in and day out…and make them your life.
  5. Realize that it takes time…not a year…not three years…a full lifetime commitment!
  6. And most importantly: DO THE FUCKING WORK BETTER THAN ANYONE.

When you do that…SUCCESS IS GUARANTEED.

Andy Frisella Recognized By Entrepreneur Magazine As One of “Top 7 Instagram Accounts That Inspire Entrepreneurs”

Entrepreneur Magazine has named Andy Frisella one of the “top 7 Instagram accounts that inspire the entrepreneurial journey.” The article’s author Matthew Toren described The MFCEO this way:

A true entrepreneur who’s not afraid to tell people to quit complaining and start doing. He’s not only the CEO of 1st Phorm, a supplements company turned multi-million dollar company, he speaks straight from the struggles he endured on his way to his success.

Click here to read the full article.